Dating Online Safely

Be Safe When You Are Dating Online

Sometimes Investigating Your Date Is A Good Idea – Especially If You Are Dating Online!

Okay, you met a special person on the internet.  You have so much in common that you spend HOURS chatting each other up.  You have traded phone numbers and really feel that special 'connection.'  It's time to meet in person.

What are you feeling – Euphoric, hopeful, excited, anxious, . . . scared?

If you don't want to put a damper on meeting your special new person by finding out as much as you can about them BEFORE you meet them – Even going as far as investigating that where they say they work and where they actually work are the same place – Then you risk the chance of cyber stalking becoming your real-life nightmare.

Find out BEFORE you meet someone who they really are.  Especially important if you meet them online where, 'Content is King!'

Go ahead and log onto one of the background check websites and find out who this new person really is.  If you like the site and date online regularly, go ahead and join.  You'll normally pay a monthly membership fee, but you get the benefit of really knowing who you are meeting by a check with your local and state authorities.

What should you do if the person you want to meet balks at this step.  What you SHOULD do is dump them immediately.

What will you do though – Will you tell yourself that you, "don't blame them for not giving out their personal information to a virtual stranger," or a bevy of handy excuses you could probably list right here for yourself.

Any person genuinely interested in you and who really cares about you will have your safety placed high as, "in their best interests," too.  If they do not, then you can bet that they never will have and that the chances of true and genuine happiness with this person will never materialize or develop completely.

A background check won't always be your best investigation.  Trust your instincts – Unless your instincts suck, then ask your best friend to go with you for a first meeting.  Always meet in a public or crowded place the first time – OR two!

What a background check does do – This is really important to know.

If you are Online Dating then a background check lets you know if your fabulous new date is wacked out or psyched out or involved in things you don't want to be – Like a pedophile who only dates women with children.  Or a thief who only dates men who own their own house.

Another benefit of a Dating Background Check is that you find out immediately – within seconds actually – whether or not your new date is sincere about you or not.

Ways to improve your experience and protect yourself with a chat dating service:

• Avoid divulging your entire history in your first email to any one person.
• Keep it to yourself – The story about what happened in your last relationship.  You parted company is all anybody really needs to know – Nothing else matters and nobody truly cares.  Keep monologues about why your last relationship ended to yourself or risk looking needy and boring, and self absorbed.
• Are you 5'5" – Say so.  If you say you are six feet tall and you show up shorter than that, your date will immediately lose their trust factor for anything else you have to say.  Nobody likes a liar.  Be honest.
• Are you listing yourself as, "physically fit," a person who, 'loves outdoor sports and activities," but you can't walk around the block without getting winded.  Be Honest – Nobody likes a liar.
• Pay attention to things that don't add up – like inconsistencies in your communications that indicate that this person isn't telling the whole truth, or has other issues.  If there are a lot of them you want to – Dump them and get hold of the website administrator to report it.
• If you feel pressure or discomfort with someone – drop them immediately.  Never mind about being nice.  The person responsible for you is . . . YOU.
• Contact the sites administrator if you are being harassed by someone.  Do it immediately.
• Never give up your personal information or allow yourself to be bullied into giving it up.  Never do this until you feel comfortable – Never.
• Smile when you pick up and answer the phone.  Even if you aren't feeling that positive, it will show on the other end of the telephone.  Be positive – Every single time you answer the phone.
• Post a photo to the people who post one to you.  It has to be YOUR photo, though and it has to be current, not over a few weeks old at the most.  Was your best picture taken ten years ago – Time for a new one!
• Try writing down your best qualities in 10-15 words.  Do you truly like to take long walks (like 99% of the population) or is there something about you more interesting than that?  Write down those things.  Do you sky dive or do underwater gardening?  Do you read books, or are you a published author?  Those are the kinds of things that will put excitement into your profile – Write them down and share them with people.
• Agree to a background check for all the above reasons if someone wants one from you.
• Do not give out your social security and driver license number.  Name and address are adequate.

With meeting people online becoming the norm in our information age, enrich your dating experience and proceed with caution to make sure your dating online experience is, 'the bees knees!'